Speaking out

Lisbon 2015       Photo by Tobi.P

I haven´t always been as outspoken as i´m today. I once had the tendency of keeping it all to myself. I would pile so much stuff in me till it would haunt me in my sleep. I would spend hours searching for the right words, the correct formulations and appropriate timing and at the end of the day, i would end up not saying a word.

I realized that its not just me, this is a problem that many people especially women face. 
May it be at the work place, at home or in our friends inner circle. Its always a milestone that one has to overcome to be able to speak out. This is especially rough if our opinion is contradicting that of the other party, or if the person in question happens to be our senior or even our boss.


Remember the tremendious number of cases where women were abused at the gynecologists examination table? I would bet that all those women noticed the weirdness of the situation, they must have felt the discomfort in the air or even pain. They might have had many questions in their heads..."What exactly are you doing there, doc?" "What good is that for?" "Why are you doing that?"
But they all went on mute mode; stumm and voiceless. Instead they might have consoled themselves with words like..."He must know what he is doing." or "I´m just building this up in my head." or "This is somehow my fault."

But why is it like that? Why is it so difficult to speak out for ourselves sometimes?

Women will stay in abusive relationships, and they will not say a thing.

Men are unhappy in marriages, but they will not dare say anything to their wives.

Employees might feel unappreciated by their bosses, but they can not confront them.

How easy life would be if we could always be able to speak out our opinions!

The abused woman would one day say: "stop!, enough!" 

The unhappy husband will tell his wife: " I don´t like when you bossy me around my friends."

The employee would tell his boss: " I´m paid way too little for the amount of work i do."

But there is always the fear in between. The fear of the counter-reaction, the fear of misunderstandings, the fear of making things worse.

The truth about the matter remains that humans are no mind readers!!!

All those beautiful thought in your head, no one will ever know them if you will never speak them out.
I have come to appreciate the power of speaking out. Most problems are caused by misunderstandings. If you speak out, you will see how the problems dissolve in the air. I wish we would stop thinking in place of others... "I thought you meant this or that," or " I think you don´t like that," and stead ask them.

Let us dare to ask! Let us dare to speak out!

I wish the lucky few a nice long weekend, and the other less lucky~myself included, successful remaining days of the week!!

A big THANKS for reading.

Lots of luv
ItsRose_Beth